Top Model Review: Makeovers pt. 2
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Continuing on with the Cycle 15 makeovers!

Kendal went from a simple country girl with short hair to an international top model with a Naomi Campbell weave!  This hair really brings out her amazing bone structure, and at 23, makes this old hag look younger.  I love it and think it was one of the best transformations of the cycle!  Did Tyra fuck her up: NO.  
Lexie...who really cares?  This boring girl went from blonde to brunette, and still does absolutely nothing for me.  She's a basic bitch who needs to pack her bags and leave.  Did Tyra fuck her up: NO, but who gives a damn?
Liz got her hair shaved off, and in turn received a sex change.  She looks like a man!  The cut does bring out her strong bone structure, but maybe a little too much.  I'm just not feeling this look on Liz.  Did Tyra fuck her up: YES.
Rhianna received a long, beautiful golden weave for her makeover, and she now looks even more stunning.  It was a subtle change, but this girl still looks absolutely gorgeous and has the potential to be a star.  Did Tyra fuck her up: NO.
Sarah was a victim of Queen Tyra's fetish for bleached eyebrows.  Not only that, but her hair was also dyed chocolate brown.  This is laughable.  Sarah looked beautiful before the makeover, and now she just looks like a circus freak.  Did Tyra fuck her up: YES!
Terra got all her hair cut off, bitched about it, and was eliminated.  AWESOME!  She had no potential to be a top model, and was basically forced to suffer the traumatic hair cut only to be cast aside.  This is why I love ANTM.  Did Tyra fuck her up: LOL NO1CURR.  This bitch was eliminated.  

Top Model Review: Makeovers pt. 1
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It's that time of the year again.  Young model hopefuls are shedding tears as a hairdresser cuts off their beautiful tresses.  Yep, it's the magical week when the new crop of America's Next Top Model contestants get their makeovers!  I actually think Tyra did a good job this season of choosing the girls' new looks (because the winner is going to be in ITALIAN VOGUE, in case you missed one of the 100 times it was said this episode) so I don't have too much to bitch about.  However, I have a few opinions and will rate the new looks.  Look for part 2 soon! 

Ann got beautiful long extensions and a nice chocolate brown color.  I love the look on her, and really think it elevates her to the level of a supermodel.  She has a real shot to win this thing.  Did Tyra fuck her up: NO.
Chelsey got the required ice blond makeover this season.  Not only that, Tyra took her to a dentist and made the gap in her teeth even bigger (which is ridiculous for anyone who knows Danielle's situation in Cycle 6).  Chelsey is one of my favorites, and I still love her.  The hair makes her look younger and more fresh.  Did Tyra fuck her up: NO.
Chris took out her braids and got the typical long black weave that Tyra gives almost every black contestant on this show.  To me, she's still bland and looks like she belongs in a Sear's catalog.  Did Tyra fuck fuck her up: Who cares, she needs to be eliminated soon.  
Esther received jet black hair and matching eyebrows for her makeover, and I really think it helped her out.  Maybe now the focus will stop being on her enormous boobs and more on her fashion potential...although I'm still not sure if she has any.  Did Tyra fuck her up: NO. 
Jane has the best bone structure in the competition, so I was amazed when Tyra didn't chop off all her hair to "show it off".  Instead she simply got her hair lightened, and now Jane looks even more divine.  I love this girl, and believe she has the most potential out of the group to make it in the fashion industry.  Did Tyra fuck her up: NO.  
The biggest transformation for Kacey wasn't even her hair, it was that she got rid of her glasses in favor of contacts.  Hers was one of the most boring makeovers this cycle.  Did Tyra fuck her up: Did Tyra even change her hair? 
Finally a drastic makeover comes in the form of Kayla.  She went from blond to RED.  Sometimes she looks like a high fashion goddess, and other times she looks like Ronald McDonald.  Did Tyra fuck her up: The jury is still out on this one...

So far, for the first time in ANTM history, the makeovers have actually helped the girls!  Look out for part 2 of this post!

Top Model Episode 1 Recap
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Alright, I've watched the episode about three times now, so I can finally share my opinion on some of the girls and their photos.

Ann- She's freaky and I love it.  Once again the stereotypical awkward, quirky girl proves she can be a high fashion model.  Ann got first call out this episode, and I couldn't agree more with the judges' decision.  I don't know if Tyra will let this girl win just because of the controversy that would surely follow, but Ann has a ton of potential and I think she could be a real fashion model. 

Kayla- She's a lesbian, and we were reminded of that every 5 minutes this episode.  Her picture really does represent something beautiful, and I'm sure Tyra recognizes this girl would be a great role model and spokesperson for the gay community, which really earns her some points.  Her picture was great, and I think Kayla will continue on in this competition for some time.

Jane- She got absolutely no screen time but I love her and think she's GORGEOUS, so I had to mention her.

Terra- Kids used to call her soup cooler...someone get me some Kleenex ASAP!  I really think she should have gone hope this episode.  Go back and cool some soup Terra, you'll never get anywhere even remotely close to Italian Vogue.

Anamaria- She was a huge bitch this entire episode, and she may possibly have an eating disorder, but I was really hoping she would stay in the competition a little longer.  I think her picture is fierce, and she's thin...that's all I care about.  Oh well, it's time for her to fade into obscurity as the first cut of the cycle.

Next week is MAKEOVERS!  Can't wait to see hair fly and bitches cry! 

Top Model Wednesday!
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A NEW EPISODE OF TOP MODEL PREMIERES TONIGHT!!!!  The highlight of my week is finally here!  I'll update with my thoughts on the episode after it airs, but here are a few predictions for tonight's episode:

1. The girls move into their new house and a ton of screaming will follow.  Just put the TV on mute for this entire portion of the show.
2. The girls have to do a fashion show on a runway suspended in mid air- one girl falls off and is eliminated for not making falling to her death look fierce enough.
3. Demi Lovato shows up at the photoshoot to teach the girls about team bullying...Demi Lovato has never been bullied a day in her life so no one gives a shit.
4. The girls do a shoot with hurtful words written on them: Tyra bathes in their tears as they remember the hardships of feeling like an outside in middle school.  RATINGS!
5. Diane Von Furstenberg is the guest judge this week, and she'll talk in her lovable albeit crazy accent.
6. One girl is eliminated from the competition, and André Leon Talley eats her. 
7. Tyra is fierce, amazing, flawless, smizing, etc. like always. 

Top Model International
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Tyra always reminds us that Top Model is shown in over 120 countries, and many places have their own versions of the show, and although they don't have goddess Tyra Banks hosting, they're still respectable.  I'm keeping up with Britain, Australia, New Zealand right now (I also watch Mexico, Canada, and Greece when they're on) but I thought I'd give a shout out to my favorite international Top Model girls. 

Amanda- Australia
Australia's Next Top Model is the best franchise of them all, and this season has been absolutely spectacular.  The girls actually look like models and the photoshoots are fashionable.  Amanda is in the top 3, and as the season comes to a close she is the clear winner for me.  Her body is AMAZING, and her face keeps getting better and better in her pictures.  She could have an international career, so I hope the judges get their shit together and crown her the winner.
Joy- Britain
Britain's Next Top Model is pretty crappy, but they've discovered real talent in Joy.  All the designers and clients love her look, and her photos are getting stronger each week.  Her personality holds her back- she's dry, sarcastic, and doesn't really want to be there/model, but IDGAF, this girl has what it takes.  She is now in the Top 4, and I'm not really expecting her to win, but it would be great if she did.
Michaela- New Zealand
I don't watch NZNTM, but I look at the pictures every week and read about the girls' personalities, and Michaela is the stand out of season 2 to me.  She takes beautiful pictures, and has a truly stunning exotic look.  The competition just started a few weeks ago, but I hope Michaela can go all the way. 

Who's Gonna Be on Top?
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Apparently after fourteen cycles of never producing a top model, Tyra decided to stop casting girls who belong in Sear's catalogs and find some contestants with true potential.  According to the casting episode, this cycle of Top Model is "elevated" and dedicated to high fashion, because Tyra knows that if she puts a mall rat on the cover of Vogue Italia, she will be shunned from the fashion world (of course Tyra is mainly thinking about her own reputation in all of this.  That's why we love her!)  So, here are my pics for the winner of Cycle 15 of Top Model, and who I think should just GTFO right now. 


Chelsey Hersley- A fierce, gap toothed beauty.  Apparently she tried to model when she was younger, but was told by agencies that she was too fat.  She has a sob story and seems to be extremely photogenic.  She's 23, which is considered almost ancient in the fashion world, but Chelsey appears fresh and young on screen, so hopefully that will translate well to her pictures on the show.  Hersley is my number one pic for the win right now. 

Jane Randall- She's the most modelesque, but her privileged background might hold her back.  Tyra loves a girl who comes from a troubled past, but that was when the winner appeared on the back cover of Seventeen Magazine.  Maybe now she'll put that aside and pick a girl who could become a star in the fashion industry, and Jane definitely has the potential to be big and finally bring this show some credibility.  

Rhianna Atwood- She's 6'1, has a gorgeous face, and already proved her amazing posing skills.  This girl is one of the most unique faces this season, and I feel like she has a look that is tailor made for high fashion.  In this photo her face kind of looks like it's melting, but I'll let that slide because I think Rhianna is going far. 


Every black contestant this season- We all know Krista won last cycle, and Queen Tyra likes to keep a diverse selection of winners.  Although Kendal is gorgeous, none of these girls stand a chance.  Should have waited until Cycle 16, ladies! 

Lexie Tomcheck- She's bitchy.  She has a horse face.  Enough said. 

Anamaria Mirdita- Who?  I barely remember her from the premiere.  Bye Bitch! 

Those are my predictions, based off of watching this show religiously for 5 years and studying every move made by the most stunning woman alive, Tyra Banks.  I can't wait to see how Cycle 15 unfolds!


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